You said “yes” again, didn’t you? How pathologic accommodation is draining veterinary professionals

In veterinary medicine, being the person who always comes through is often celebrated, until it starts costing more than it's worth. In this episode of The Resilient Vet: Mind and Body Strategies for Success, cohosts Aaron Shaw, OTR/L, CHT, CSCS, and Jennifer Edwards, DVM, ACC, CPC, ELI-MP, examine chronic over-accommodation—a habit that gets rewarded in veterinary medicine while quietly depleting the people who practice it. Edwards introduces the concept of the "pathologic accommodator," breaks down how the pattern develops, and offers a practical path forward through grounded self-advocacy: honoring personal values and communicating with clarity without abandoning accommodation altogether.

Below is a partial transcript, lightly edited for improved clarity.

Edwards: Are you a pathologic accommodator?

Okay, wait, what did I just say? Yeah, I asked you if you're a pathologic accommodator. You see, many years ago, when I was a practice owner, one of my longtime coaches looked at me and said, "Jennifer, you're a pathologic accommodator."

Now, I laughed because it sounded kind of funny, but that's also because what we often do when people point things out that are true, but perhaps we're not really quite ready to own. That was a long time ago, and what I've learned since then is that chronic over-accommodation is actually really common. It's not that people who do this—which there are a lot of us—it's not that we have a personality flaw. It's more like we have a habit. We have a habit of saying yes or not saying no.

Well, what happens? It's kind of like a slow leak. Imagine you're in a rowboat and you're drilling lots of tiny holes in that rowboat. A lot of times we don't notice it at first, but then all of a sudden, we find out the boat is starting to sink.

I'm Dr Jennifer Edwards, and welcome to the Resilient Vet Podcast: Mind and Body Strategies for Success. This is the podcast where we get real about what it actually takes to sustain a career in veterinary medicine, not just professionally, but as a whole person. And today we are diving into something that a lot of us have as a habit that we've lived and maybe never actually had a name for.

So, what happens when saying yes becomes that habit that we can't turn off, and what it costs us over time? It eroded my effectiveness as a leader and my quality of life, and it could be eroding yours.